Growing up, I saw a big gap between the expectations of my lower middle-class family and those of wealthier friends. I often found myself stressed over things they seemed to take for granted, like resumes and college applications. Here’s a peek into the eight strict expectations many of us faced, alongside some insights into why they mattered.
1) Excel Academically
In my world, getting anything less than an A was unacceptable. My parents, both educators, understood that without excellent grades, scholarships were out of reach, and college would mean heavy debt. While friends with rich families could coast through school, I knew that every single grade could change my future.
2) Don’t Waste Food
For many lower middle-class families, wasting food felt like tossing money in the trash. We repurposed every leftover; that half-eaten sandwich turned into tomorrow’s breakfast. Friends in wealthier homes didn’t think twice about leaving food uneaten. For us, being mindful about meals was essential because every dollar counted.
3) Work Early
As soon as I turned 16, I filled out job applications instead of throwing a party. My job wasn’t about character-building but rather necessity. While others enjoyed carefree summers, I bagged groceries to save for textbooks. The work ethic was clear: if you wanted anything beyond survival, you worked for it.
4) DIY Repairs
When something broke, calling a repair person was a last resort. We learned to fix things ourselves, using library books instead of how-to videos. This didn’t just make us resourceful; it also taught us to handle problems with limited resources. Each repair felt like a personal challenge.
5) Hand-Me-Downs
New clothes were a luxury. Most of what I wore came from older family members or thrift stores. Rejecting hand-me-downs wasn’t an option; instead, I learned to mix and match to create a unique look. This extended to other items—if something still worked, it was used.
6) Purposeful Activities
Extracurriculars weren’t about fun but strategy. Each activity had to serve a purpose—be it enhancing a resume or building skills. Friends from affluent backgrounds explored hobbies freely, while I chose activities based on their potential returns.
7) Family First
Family was non-negotiable. When a relative needed help, we showed up, no questions asked. This wasn’t seen as a burden; it was simply part of life. Wealthier friends could prioritize personal goals, but for many of us, family obligations came first.
8) Hide Financial Struggles
Perhaps the toughest expectation was maintaining the appearance of stability. Admitting financial struggles felt like failure, so we learned to smile through tough times. This created a pressure to maintain appearances that often weighed heavily on us.
These expectations shaped my resilience and work ethic. But they also left scars, like anxiety about money and trouble accepting help.
If you relate to these experiences, know you’re not alone. The strengths developed from these challenges are real. If you didn’t grow up with these expectations, this might give you insight into how others view life.
Understanding these differences can help bridge economic divides and foster empathy. Our past may be set, but our present can be shaped by compassion and awareness.
Interestingly, recent studies show that 60% of individuals from lower-income backgrounds feel they must work harder than their wealthier peers to achieve the same success. This data highlights that these expectations aren’t just personal—they’re shared experiences.
For more insights into social and economic divides, check out reports from organizations like the Pew Research Center that shed light on these issues.
