8 Vegan Foods Everyone Pretends to Love (But Secretly Dislikes)

Six years into my vegan journey, I’ve learned to navigate the tricky waters of plant-based cuisine. The quest for delicious alternatives can often lead to some culinary misadventures. Let’s be honest: some vegan foods just don’t hit the mark. Here’s a candid look at a few of them.

### Nutritional Yeast

First up is nutritional yeast, affectionately known as “nooch.” Many rave about its cheesy flavor, but let’s face it—it often tastes like ground-up vitamins mixed with disappointment. I’ve seen new vegans make a brave effort to enjoy it, only to see their true feelings show through their expressions. Despite having three jars collecting dust in my pantry, we keep using it because we think we should.

### Raw Cashew Cheese

Next, we have raw cashew cheese. Sure, it sounds fancy, but the reality is often grainy and slimy. I’ve sunk money into artisanal versions that taste like mixed nuts with a side of hope. At parties, friends will try to be polite, searching for the right words as they sample it. “Interesting” and “nutty” are often the safe words. Deep down, we all know there are better snacks out there.

### Spirulina

Then there’s spirulina. This blue-green algae is rich in protein but comes with a taste that’s hard to love—think licking an aquarium. We toss it into smoothies filled with berries and hope for the best while secretly adding scoops of peanut butter to mask the taste. Instagram may present these as “superfood smoothies,” but we know the truth.

### Tempeh

Tempeh can be an acquired taste, to say the least. Its nutty and often bitter flavor is tough to hide, no matter how much marinade you pour on it. Every vegan cookbook touts it as a versatile protein source, but it can feel more like chewing on compressed sawdust. I often find it lurking in my freezer until I can finally toss it guilt-free.

### The Daiya Cheese Days

Let’s not forget early Daiya cheese, which many veterans of veganism still shudder over. It was notorious for its glue-like consistency and a texture reminiscent of sun-baked plastic. Thankfully, the recipe has improved, but we still remember those awkward pizza nights where we had to convince ourselves it was “fine.”

### Seitan

Seitan, made from wheat gluten, offers a chewy texture that isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. When cooked poorly, it can feel like you’re biting into a rubber boot. But with its high protein content, we often try to convince ourselves it’s a suitable meat substitute, even if it leaves us feeling like we’ve had to chew our way through a workout.

### Carob

Don’t even get me started on carob. It’s a poor stand-in for chocolate, tasting more like burnt powder than sweet indulgence. Yet we keep trying it, thinking maybe our taste buds have changed, only to go through the same circle of hope and disappointment.

### Rice Paper Bacon

And finally, rice paper bacon. The concept sounds promising—crispy and smoky—but it ends up tasting more like seasoned paper. We serve it at brunch, layering it into our “BLTs,” all while knowing deep down that it doesn’t compare to the real thing.

### Final Thoughts

Here’s what I’ve realized: acknowledging that some vegan foods can be subpar doesn’t make you a bad vegan. It makes you honest. We adopt a plant-based lifestyle for ethical reasons, not because we’re obsessed with every vegan product on the market.

In recent years, the variety and quality of vegan options have dramatically improved. Companies like Miyoko’s are creating dairy-free cheeses that actually taste great, and products like Beyond Meat are changing the way we think about plant-based protein, moving beyond undesirable textures.

While we wait for more delicious advancements, it’s okay to chuckle at our spirulina smoothies and heartily agree that tempeh may never be a favorite. And if a new vegan friend serves you cashew cheese at a gathering, remember to be kind—they’re just beginning their journey and figuring it all out too.

As we embrace honesty in our plant-based choices, let’s also celebrate the exciting developments in vegan food. We’re in this together, and every step counts. And who knows? The next time you open a jar of nutritional yeast, maybe you’ll find it tastes a little better.



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