My daughter called me last week, a bit frustrated. “Mom, you don’t need to save every article about retirement planning for me. I have the internet.” But here’s the thing: I had clipped three more articles that very morning, ready to mail her.
Some habits run deeper than logic, especially for a mom from a time when information meant collecting and sharing it. We boomers learned from those who showed love through action, not just words.
Even though my kids are now adults, I can’t help but do things they never asked for.
Clipping Articles
When I see an article about career growth or healthy eating, my scissors come out. It feels good to cut, fold, and mail something with my own hands. My son once reminded me he reads the same paper online, but more often than not, he finds an envelope in his mailbox every Tuesday. Maybe he recycles them, but it’s about the gesture.
Reminders About Daylight Saving
Every spring and fall, I send a text: “Don’t forget to spring forward!” Their phones do it automatically, but what if they forget? I can’t shake the feeling that it’s safer for me to remind them.
Stocking Their Freezers
When I visit, I bring frozen soups and casseroles, neatly labeled. No one asked for this—I know they cook well. But it brings me peace to know they have homemade meals ready.
Practical Gifts
I have a habit of gifting practical items—like batteries and dish towels. My daughter calls it “Mom’s Random Essentials Service.” But when I see something useful, I can’t help but buy it for them. It’s just how I think now.
Worrying About Relationships
When my kids mention struggles, I want to help. Yet I’ve learned to hold back. I still feel their stress as if it were my own.
Keeping Childhood Rooms
Many of us have rooms that look like they did decades ago, filled with trophies and yearbooks. It’s a comfort to hold onto that part of their lives.
Offering Financial Advice
We grew up in different times, and while I see my kids managing their finances well, I can’t resist asking, “Are you saving enough?” Old habits die hard.
Checking the Weather
Each morning, I check the weather where my kids live. I text them if bad weather is coming, even though they have apps for that.
Maintaining Traditions
I still call my daughter every Sunday evening, a habit that started when she went to college. We’ve kept it going for years. Sometimes it feels obligatory, but we both continue it because it matters.
Final Thoughts
Recently, I found my mother’s old recipe box. Each card spoke of meals she made for me long after I moved out. I realized my need to keep mothering is about more than my kids. It’s about keeping those bonds strong. They may not need me to clip articles or check the weather, but I need to do those things. It’s how I express love—a language passed down through generations.
In today’s world, many parents feel their children are self-sufficient, thanks to technology. Yet, the nurturing instinct remains strong. According to a 2022 survey by AARP, 73% of parents still offer advice or support to their adult children, reflecting a desire to stay involved in their lives.
Whether it’s clipping an article or sending a weather warning, these small acts of care help maintain our connections. And honestly? I don’t think we’ll ever stop.
