I just turned 20, and my mom is starting to worry. Lately, she keeps asking if I’m dating anyone. My lack of enthusiasm in answering probably adds to her concern.
“I want you to find someone special and be happy,” she says often. I get it; I want to be happy too. But the idea of finding a partner and actually being happy feels far apart right now.
Growing up, I was surrounded by fairy tales and movies about love. I pictured my love life as something magical, filled with joy and certainty. I believed that love was the key to a meaningful life.
But reality hit hard. My first serious relationship came too soon. I was just starting to understand myself, yet I quickly found my days revolving around someone else. I was constantly waiting for his messages, trying to figure out our next move. My happiness hinged on his responses.
That dependence on someone else’s actions began to suffocate me. It’s easy to think it’s all about love, but I realized how lonely I felt seeking validation from that relationship.
I wasn’t being foolish; I was just young and learning. I tied my self-worth to others’ opinions and my appearance instead of focusing on who I really am.
Experts in mental health emphasize that self-identity is crucial, especially in your twenties. According to the American Psychological Association, many people struggle with self-image during this time. Instead of tying our happiness to relationships, experts advise building a strong sense of self.
Trends on social media reflect this shift. Many young people are discussing the importance of self-love and personal growth, often using hashtags like #selfcare and #youareenough. It’s encouraging to see more people focusing on who they are, rather than who they love.
In today’s world, happiness doesn’t just come from being in love. It’s about knowing yourself, your values, and what makes you tick. Understanding this will shape not just my relationships but my entire future.
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Women's Voices, finding love,romance,singlehood
