Dear Abby: I’ve been married for 19 years to my second husband, Jack. Our kids are all grown up now. When we met, I was running my own business while he was enjoying retirement. Jack has faced many health issues, and I’ve always made sure he’s covered by my health insurance. We’ve kept our finances separate, only sharing a household account. I’ve never needed to ask him for money, and I’ve always contributed to our expenses.
Now that I’m working full time and receiving Social Security, I’m saving for my retirement since I don’t count on any money from Jack. Recently, Jack noticed my increased income and wants me to put more into the household account. I don’t think this is fair. I handle most of the household chores, especially since Jack’s health limits his strength. What do you think? — Working Gal in Washington
Dear Working Gal: It sounds like your marriage feels more like a business arrangement than a true partnership. If you’re included in Jack’s estate plans, it’s essential to know the details, especially since you may need those funds later. Consulting a financial adviser before adding any of your retirement savings to the household account is wise.
Dear Abby: My niece just finished her doctorate, and I’m invited to celebrate. A local bakery will cater the meal. I have celiac disease, meaning I can’t eat wheat. My family knows this because another niece has the same issue. Unfortunately, the bakery doesn’t have their menu online, and I can’t find much information about them.
Should I bring my own food, or just go for the baked potato they mentioned? I enjoy baked potatoes, but I’d need more than that for the four-hour drive. Should I voice my dietary restrictions before the event, or should I keep quiet? — Restricted in Ohio
Dear Restricted: Just because the bakery lacks an online presence doesn’t mean they can’t accommodate you. Give them a call, share your dietary needs, and see if they can offer more than just a baked potato; you might be pleasantly surprised. If they can’t help, pack something tasty to eat on your way rather than feeling deprived during the celebration.
Abigail Van Buren, known as Jeanne Phillips, founded this column with her mother, Pauline Phillips. For more insights, visit Dear Abby.
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