Transform Your Space: Overcome ‘House Shame’ with These Inspiring Ideas

Robbie Randolph, a real estate agent and designer, understands “house shame” all too well. This feeling often stems from comparing our homes to the polished spaces we see on social media. It can leave anyone feeling anxious and even reluctant to host friends and family.

House shame is about more than just aesthetics. It can lead to isolation and stress as people feel pressured to meet unrealistic standards of home perfection. Randolph notes that even interior designers feel it. “I may post about a stunningly decorated home and then look at my own—and it hits me,” he shared. This comparison game affects everyone, from parents juggling young kids to those who simply don’t have the budget for pricey updates.

Experts like Barbara Fight, a home organizer, point out that social media has intensified house shame. Many people feel overwhelmed by their possessions, making it hard to invite others over. Fight suggests tackling this by decluttering. “Try removing a third of what you have on display,” she advises. This simple change can make a space feel much more inviting without needing a complete renovation.

Jamila Musayeva, an etiquette coach and author, emphasizes that homes need not be perfect to be welcoming. She suggests focusing on small, controlled changes, like lighting a candle or arranging fresh flowers. This shift in mindset can help turn a home into a cozy haven for guests, even if the rest of the space still needs some work.

Wendy Trunz, an organizer from Long Island, shares her personal experience growing up in a small house. Despite its size, her family made it a warm gathering place. She believes memories matter more than perfection. “My mom always had an open door,” she recalls, suggesting that we embrace the mess and prioritize connection over appearance.

Interestingly, the COVID-19 pandemic also played a role in house shame. More people found themselves at home, and for some, this meant neglecting their living spaces. Even now, many have yet to return to hosting meals around the dining table, still hesitating because of clutter and stress.

In the world of social media, Grant Magdanz has gained attention for showcasing his life with his grandmother in Los Angeles. His charming videos reveal the beauty in everyday messiness, reminding viewers that not everyone’s life is polished for Instagram. “Most people aren’t curated,” he points out, highlighting the joy in authenticity.

While the pressure to achieve a flawless home can feel overwhelming, remember: you’re not alone. Embracing memories and genuine connections can bring warmth back into any space, house shame or not. Focusing on creating a welcoming atmosphere can make any home a cherished gathering spot.



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