Unlocking Success: Why Education and Soft Skills Are Essential for Everyone

During the pandemic, many of us worried about our children’s learning. Would they be able to keep up? The truth is, the pandemic impacted education, especially in poorer communities. While some students may have had better resources, all kids faced challenges, and many continue to do so.

It’s not just academics that suffered. Children also missed out on important “soft” skills, like staying focused, listening carefully, and working through discomfort. Many teachers are now facing behavioral issues, which make learning harder for everyone. It feels like we’re all falling behind.

Kids need to understand that struggle can build essential skills. We need to teach them about empathy, patience, and self-awareness. One of the crucial skills is self-regulation. This means understanding when to speak and when to listen, being patient, and recognizing the feelings of others. It’s about being able to hold back impulsive reactions and think before acting. These abilities are vital for healthy adult life.

The primary goal of teaching and parenting is to prepare children for adulthood. We want them to develop important skills like determination, adaptability, curiosity, and the ability to form deep connections with others. These are the skills that contribute to mental well-being.

Jewish communities are great places for fostering these skills. Through studying texts, children learn how to engage in respectful discussions. They gain insights into relationships from Torah stories. For those who have the opportunity, mussar teaches how to live ethically. However, these skills don’t come automatically; kids need to be taught explicitly.

Religious education should not only focus on traditional subjects but also incorporate lessons on soft skills. When we teach history or values, we should intentionally weave in lessons about empathy and resilience. For example, stories from the Torah can illustrate important life lessons, but we can’t assume kids will understand these messages without guidance.

Many effective curricula exist, created by experts in education. But it’s crucial that these lessons meet the unique needs of today’s world. We must equip our children and their parents to be thoughtful members of society, where kindness, character, and problem-solving are valued. Our narratives and values provide a solid foundation for this important work.

Betsy Stone is a retired psychologist who collaborates with camps, synagogues, and Jewish organizations. She authored Refuah Shlema: Reflections on Healing and Growth, which compiles her earlier writings.

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